The Advice Column

[charliechaplinfan]

Did someone say Peanut M and Ms? Oh my I can't leave them alone and I can't have a fridge that hasn't got chocolate in, apart from the M & Ms I'm really good but it drives my hubby wild, he never bothered with chocolate before he met me but everytime he opens the fridge there is an open block of chocolate waiting looking at him. He blames me for his weight gain since we got together

[RedRiver]

With bite size peanut butter cups, at least you have to unwrap them. That slows the process a little. M&Ms? Lord help us!

[charliechaplinfan]

Peanut M & Ms were made to blow even the strongest will.

[MissGoddess]

I wasn't quite sure where to put this, but since it's rather sensible advice I'll post it here.

For any among the lovelorn, this is for you. It is from a gentleman written in reply to a dear friend's letter (a lady):

It is difficult for me to wag my finger at you from so very far away particularly as my heart aches for you but really darling you must pack up this nonsensical situation once and for all. It is really beneath your dignity...as a human, only too human, being. Curly is attractive, beguiling, tender and fascinating, but he is not the only man in the world who merits those delightful adjectives...Do please try to work out for yourself a little personal philosophy and DO NOT, repeat DO NOT be so bloody vulnerable. To hell with God damned "L'Amour." It always causes far more trouble than it is worth. Don't run after it. Don't court it. Keep it waiting off stage until you're good and ready for it and even then treat it with the suspicious disdain that it deserves...I am sick to death of you waiting about in empty houses and apartments with your ears strained for the telephone to ring. Snap out of it, girl! A very brilliant writer once said (could it have been me?) "Life is for the living." Well that is all it is for, and living DOES NOT consist of staring in at other people's windows and waiting for crumbs to be thrown to you. You've carried on this hole in corner, overcharged, romantic, unrealistic nonsense long enough.

Stop it Stop it Stop it. Other people need you...Stop wasting your time on someone who only really says tender things to you when he's drunk...

Unpack your sense of humor, and get on with living and ENJOY IT.


Not bad advice, is it?

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........................and in case you are wondering, this excerpt is from a letter written by Noel Coward to Marlene Dietrich regarding her heartache over Yul Brynner. No one is immune to L'amour!

[JackFavell]

Oh my gosh, this is brilliant! I thought it sounded like Coward before I finished the first sentence, I don't know why. I wish someone had said that to me when I was young.

It is good advice, isn't it? I imagine he might have had a few situations over the years where he needed the same advice.

[MissGoddess]

Imagine someone like Dietrich sitting around waiting for a man to call...like me! Just goes to show you.

[JackFavell]

It really does. I can't imagine it, but there were a couple of guys she couldn't get.

[MissGoddess]

It really does. I can't imagine it, but there were a couple of guys she couldn't get.

I guess there always will be!

[moira finnie]

Great letter, Miss G. Too bad Marlene didn't take it to heart all the time. She appears to have been the one out the door first rather than the lonely heart waiting for the phone to ring most of the time. Except once, according to legend. Jean Gabin and she broke it off after their one (reportedly disastrous) film, Martin Roumagnac, made together in 1946. She left Paris for Hollywood. He supposedly never again spoke her name, but married and had children with a younger woman.

That didn't deter Dietrich from nursing that flame. She is supposed to have purchased an apartment on the Avenue Montaigne in Paris because it was near his home. She dwelt there for the rest of her life. Rumor has it that she followed him furtively on the streets of Paris for the rest of his life, though they probably never met again.

Is it any wonder why Yul looked like a possible way to drown that torch? BTW, Gabin didn't pass away until Dietrich's long-time beard hubby, Rudi had died. When she heard the news, she is supposed to have said, "Now I am a widow for the second time."

[charliechaplinfan]

Gosh, I read it twice before reading the ending, I can identify with the teenage me, thankfully only briefly but it was sent to Marlene, it means there is hope for us all and vulnerability in us all too.

[CineMaven]

It is difficult for me to wag my finger at you from so very far away particularly as my heart aches for you but really darling you must pack up this nonsensical situation once and for all... - Noel Coward.

Whew!! Coward was a great writer...and offered a very convincing argument. Gee...if only the heart had ears to listen to his words.

[charliechaplinfan]

We could sure all do with a Noel Coward once in a while.

[moira finnie]

Here's a dilemma that crops up every Christmas. One family member is extremely hard to buy a gift for at the best of times. This year, four of us got together to get this person something a bit out of the ordinary that will entail a rearrangement of furniture and patterns in order to give something that just might ease aches and pains and to express our love for this person.

I am tempted to prime this person a bit beforehand so there is a minimum of drama and/or dismissal of our efforts to give something extra nice to our relative. Am I a fool to even try?

[JackFavell]

I am wondering if a solution mightn't be to give the gift in front of a large crowd, where the person would be on their best behavior and unable to turn down the gift.

[moira finnie]

I am wondering if a solution mightn't be to give the gift in front of a large crowd, where the person would be on their best behavior and unable to turn down the gift.

Good idea, Wen. That is really one reason I thought I'd prime this individual a bit. It takes a certain amount of graciousness to accept what others have to give--and it helps to spring it in front of others. I just don't want anyone's feelings hurt.

BTW, despite your "lovely and thoughtful" avatar, it sure isn't a vacuum cleaner...or a new mop...or a skillet...or an iron. All these things would wind up being thrown in the front yard in all likelihood.