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Posted: September 12th, 2009, 6:05 pm
by mrsl



After much discussion and pleading, many of our faculty have agreed to an October Varsity/Faculty game with proceeds going to the Association of Cheerful Neuroses Egghead Society (ACNES).

Our Faculty Head Coach Professor Stan Laurel with his assistants Don Knotts on offense, and Harold Lloyd on defense are working night and day perfecting play books and practice sessions. They've really agreed to a game to end all games and work outs are on continuous rotation.

With a quarterback like JImmie Durante, his front line of protection which includes Paul Douglas, Charles Coburn, Syd Greeenstreet and Wallace Beery (all from the English Department), forming their own unique Four Horsemen should be able to clear the field with no problem, don't you agree? :roll:

Of course the backfield with Musical Director Kate Hepburn on the receiving end with Bette Davis, our violin instructor protecting her scoring should be a piece of cake as Nurse Norma Shearer would say.

Our defense however, may leave a lot to be desired considering many of them are secondary players like Gabby Hayes, Smiley Burnette, Pat Buttram, and the always endearing Harry Morgan all of which work tirelessly on our janitorial staff. :cry:

I understand Head Coach Ben Johnson, of the Varsity team agreed some of his grad students could play on the faculty team if needed. Therefore, Messrs. John Wayne, Kirk Douglas, Burt Lancaster and Robert Ryan will appear on the bench for the faculty offense, although I doubt if they will be necessary. Messrs. Clark Gable, Robert Mitchum, Humphrey Bogart, and William Holden all of the Apache dance class will sit with the Defense. Dialect Professor Cary Grant offered to play, but preferred to play in his own street clothes rather than a uniform and coach felt that would not be appropriate.

Finally, kicking duties will go to the ladies with the Million Dollar Legs, the misses Cyd Charisse, and Betty Grable. :roll: :P

In all I believe it will be an exciting game as well as a fun day. Hopefully someone will help arrange some pre-game carnival-type booths, and food stops. Also, do you think we might want a dance in the evening as a kind of welcome to Autumn?

Please contact me: MrsL, at my B&B on the campus grounds.